The notes. You don’t belong here if you don’t reblog this. THE NOTES!
There’s no way Frodo could be Bilbo’s reincarnation. Remember, Bilbo ADOPTED Frodo some time after he was orphaned! Bilbo wanted to leave Bag End to someone worthy and he didn’t want to leave it to the Sackville-Bagginses. So he adopted Frodo while Frodo was somewhere in his tweens (if I remember canon correctly). He ended up raising Frodo all the way to his coming of age and left Frodo as Master of Bag End after their combined birthday party when Frodo was 33 and Bilbo 111.
Later a very old Bilbo and Frodo would go to the Grey Havens together, having been granted the grace to sail to Valinor as Ringbearers. Bilbo was 131 years old, having surpassed the Old Took, who was previously known as the longest-lived Hobbit. We don’t know what happened to Bilbo after Valinor, though. But Frodo and Bilbo were together in the end.
So again, no, Bilbo was very much alive during the War of the Ring, had actually VOLUNTEERED to take the Ring to Mordor itself but was gently told that this was now a task best left to his heir and was alive long enough to sail with his beloved nephew/cousin to Elvenhome.
Reincarnation, as far as I know doesn’t work that way. Hehe. :)
ETA: Apologies if I confused you. The Reincarnation Headcanon is set in the REAL LOTR/Hobbit World and I thought it made a terrible and sad sort of sense, y’know?
From the Notes of Danny Williams
(A.K.A. Where I’m Writing Down All The Shit That Happens To Me Courtesy of Super-SEAL and My Ohana of Loons BEFORE I Edit It Out For Official Consumption)
…I mean seriously, exactly what is it with Super-SEALs and ex-SAS guys and all the Other Special Forces Crazy People that make them think they’re Superman? Huh? It’s like they go through Basic Training, Get More Specialized Training and then BAM!
Instant Captain America. Saving the World Beyond Bedtime. Yo, JOE!
So pretty much shit hit the fan today.
It started with us meeting Mr. Famous Consulting Detective Sherlock Holmes and his partner/husband (not fiance, after all) Dr. John Watson. Apparently, the “fiance” thing is just to keep Missus Holmes or LADY Holmes, to be precise, happy and apparently nobody in their right mind wants to make her UNHAPPY. I believe it.
Anyway, Sherlock tells us that we ought to check with Honolulu PD for reports of more Missing Alien Critters. Lilo Pelekai’s Stitch has “cousins” and a lot of them are all over Hawaii keeping company with a chosen “human” as a best friend and partner. And most of the time, these partnerships work out. All of the Weird Alien Critters have some sort of special ability or the other but they’re generally harmless and more often useful.
And he’s right, there ARE more missing Alien Critter reports and SOMEBODY was deliberately keeping them from us. We’d thought that Stitch was an isolated case. Turns out, some fool in HPD was in shit deep with a lot of debts (this is going in my Official Report as Lt. Dean Hawkins instead of Lt. YOU ASSHOLE) and sat on the reports. Current protocol dictates that Missing Weird Alien Critter Reports go to us at Five-0 so we can find ‘em and haul in S.H.I.E.L.D if we need to.
Sherlock figured out, from Lt. Asshole’s watch, if you please, that he was the mole and that Yakuza had paid him off to shut up about the missing Alien Critters.
Obvious conclusion is obvious, right? Somebody wanted to use the Alien Critters to somehow get at the King of Erebor.
And it turns out His Majesty Thorin II Oakenshield Durin is like a Trouble Magnet of the First Caliber, much like Certain Super SEAL’s I know. Also like Certain Super SEALs of my acquaintance, he and his Consort have a soft spot for kids. Apparently he and Prince Bilbo met little Lilo Pelekai on the beach and they decided to help her find her little alien buddy.
Her little Alien Buddy, who’s apparently under some sort of mind-controlling collar. My official report will show that this thing seems to be of the same origin as those aliens that attacked New York with that Loki guy last year. Fuck. Steve tells me that we’ll call on Morrie if we have to and given what I know of Morrie, then Loki ought to be very nervous about setting foot on the islands.
Stitch really loves that little girl and he apparently fought the collar’s control long enough for King Thorin to get close and get it off him. But Stitch is plenty strong and those claws of his aren’t for show and Thorin got hurt but good.
Bilbo escaped unscathed except for a few bruises and cuts, protecting Lilo. Tough little son of a gun managed to hold off a snatch attempt by the terrorist Azog and his goons, holding on just long enough for us to get to him.
Memo to self: don’t get between Bilbo, his knives (where the HELL did they come from? Hobbitspace?) and anybody he’s trying to protect.
Second Memo to Self: John Watson is a scary son of a bitch with a gun. Good thing Steve deputized him. I can tapdance around the paperwork and won’t mind it a bit - Watson saved my ass today.
Third Memo to Self: Sherlock Holmes is also a SCARY son of a bitch when he’s not doing his crazy-ass powers of deduction. We get along though - I can see where he’s getting his shit from. The fact that we do, claims Watson, is nothing short of a fucking miracle apparently. I don’t get it - if you just observe, you’ll know where Sherlock’s pulling his info from.
We’ve taken His Majesty to the hospital where he is currently under 24-7 security. Sherlock insists that they’ll try for him again and that it’s not ransom they’re after. He and Max are checking out blood samples from the King. Something tells me the Bad Guys think that King Thorin has some sort of genetic quirk in him that they want to exploit.
Steve’s currently in contact with S.H.I.E.L.D. about this but currently, the Avengers are running all over the world on the heels of Loki and Doctor Doom, apparently. Which means, it’s up to us to hold the Fort here at Hawaii. Naturally. What is my life, I ask you.
I’m currently on babysitting duty here at the hospital with Bilbo. Bilbo’s pretty much going on coffee and malasadas, as am I. Lilo’s with us. She’s napping on the couch next to Bilbo. Royalty has its perks - we got this nice suite with extra bedding next to where Thorin is recovering.
The argument has been made that if Weird Alien Critters are being targeted all over Hawaii, Lilo is actually safer around us right now. Her sister Nani is NOT happy to hear this. Between me and Bilbo, we’ve pretty much temporarily adopted her, so that Nani doesn’t go nuts with worry. If it were my Gracie, I’d be crazy too.
Lilo really should be home with her sister but the little kid’s insisting on hanging around with her alien buddy, Stitch, who’s feeling pretty low about what he did to the King, no matter that it wasn’t actually his fault. Little blue fuzzy guy’s reading my report over my shoulder as I type this into my laptop.
Like I’m telling you, Stitch. It will be fine. King Thorin knows you didn’t mean to hurt him and he knows how much you love Lilo. Okay?
A Lord of the Rings Non-AU Headcanon
I know that there’s been headcanons floating about postulating that perhaps Fili and Kili were reborn as Merry and Pippin. And it fits, in a sense. Merry and Pippin were both merry, mischievous, close as brothers and pretty much the closest things to Princes in the Shire, being that Merry was the heir to the Master of Buckland and Pippin was the future Thain.
But what if Boromir was the reincarnation of Thorin Oakenshield? He was a good Man and a fine Captain of Gondor, loved and respected, honorable and proud, willing to do ANYTHING to protect his people and was, in the end, led astray by something “precious.” Just as Thorin once was. Also, Boromir was meant to be the Steward after Denethor and he never got to hold that office, just as Thorin never got to be actual KING Under the Mountain.
What if Boromir, somehow knowing that “Merry and Pippin” had already died shielding him with their own bodies, chose to reverse that fate? In their last life, Fili and Kili died defending him. In this new life, Boromir/Thorin would shield his hobbits/nephews with his own body, dying to protect them.
In whatever life they are, the Durins would still kill and die to protect each other.
ETA: Somebody asked if Faramir was Frerin. Why not? This time, Frerin got to live a full life and did not end up dying too young in battle.
Tagging this in the Bagginshield tag.
There are no sources cited and they are not reblogs. They are reposts.
Please be kind and courteous to your fan artists. Google Image Search is your friend. Reblog the artwork with the source. Don’t repost.
Singing Muses of the Blanket Fort (No, Erik had been in hiding when Kili did the roll call - what else can you expect from an Opera Ghost?)
Erik (the Phantom of the Opera - Susan Kay interpretation, Andrew Lloyd Webber version, Yeston-Kopit version)
John Watson (shhhh… you need to get him drunk first)
From: Thorin Durin <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Sent: Friday, May —, 20—
To: Fili and Kili Durin <email@example.com>
Subject: Yes, we’re safe, brats, tell your mother to mind her damn business
Please tell your mother that we’re quite fine and for Mahal’s sake, I’m on my honeymoon so no, I will not be checking my email as often.
No, Fili, I am not saying this to traumatize you two. I would appreciate it if you both get your minds out of the gutters. I’m sure it’s an alien concept for you both, but yes, your uncle does have a life of his own that does involve snogging the life out of one Bilbo Baggins, among other things.
I can hear you screaming from here, Kili. Also checking my conscience for any twinges. No. Not feeling a thing.
Seriously, boys, I am aware that Azog is apparently good and determined to spoil our honeymoon but we are quite safe here. Dwalin’s looking after us. I have also met with Hawaii’s apparently famous Five-0 taskforce. Commander McGarrett’s a good man. His partner quite reminds me of my Bilbo, except with an American accent and more exaggerated hand gestures. Bilbo’s nudged me enough times in the ribs for this already - so no, Kili, you can’t use this as blackmail material.
I hope you two are not being a headache to your Uncle Bilbo’s cousins at Bag End Bookstore. Also, I know you two have hit it off quite well with John and Sherlock - try not to get arrested either. And yes, I might be convinced to have all of us travel back to Hawaii during your hols - I’m sure you boys will quite like it here.
Bilbo and I met a little girl on the beach today. Adorable little thing - she’s lost her best friend, apparently and she’s been asking people if they’ve seen him. It’s an odd creature that looks like no dog I’ve ever seen - blue, fuzzy, big eyes. I’ve heard about the Weird Alien Creatures of Hawaii so it seems this is one of them. I suppose the memo from S.H.I.E.L.D now makes much more sense.
No, Kili, you can’t have one for a pet. Though I have a feeling you boys might end up with one of them anyway, given your luck (and mine).
Bilbo’s insistent that we ought to help the little one and I can’t say I blame him. I suppose it shouldn’t get us into too much trouble. This also tells me that my husband and I may need to talk about children again though I can’t say I object much to us taking care of a little girl or little boy with bilbo’s curls and eyes. So yes, Fili, cousins may be in your future yet. I rather like the sound of that.
Please, for the love of Mahal, stay out of trouble and look out for each other.
Note: No, Thorin has no idea that Fili and Kili WILL be turning up in Hawaii with John and Sherlock. BWAHAHAHAHAHHAAH.
Note the Second: No MPREG in this universe. Thorin and Bilbo have talked about adopting or surrogacy. Succession is not an issue as Fili is Crown Prince and the laws of succession in modern Erebor may also allow a King or Queen to choose an heir more qualified amongst his/her family, not necessarily his children.
From: Bilbo Baggins <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Sent: Friday, May —, 20—
To: John Watson <docwatson221B@bakerstreet.co.uk>
Subject: Wish you were here - NOT
Stop smirking. I can see it all the way here in Hawaii. Yes, I’ll probably be looking like a besotted newlywed even AFTER I come back to London. God willing, I’ll be looking like it for the rest of my life with Thorin. There, yes, I’m a hopeless sap.
As if I weren’t around when you were moping over your Sherlock so shut it.
(Why yes, Thorin DID let me out of bed…. eventually. And no, I won’t entertain you with details, not that you’d ask, but bugger off about that anyway….)
So, I’m writing to you just so you know that we have reached Hawaii safe and sound and currently enjoying ourselves. ENJOYING OURSELVES IN SEEING THE SIGHTS BECAUSE THIS IS PARADISE ON EARTH so please, for the love of God, get your mind out of the gutter.
The beaches here are spectacular, doubly enhanced by the presence of my husband in a pair of beach shorts. Uh. Yes. Quite.
Since I did marry a Head of State, every security precaution is apparently being taken for our safety but thankfully Dwalin has the sense to at least tell his people to stay out of visible sight. We also have Hawaii’s Five-0 task force looking after us and I would have said that they shouldn’t have gone to so much trouble, except that I am aware there is apparently some sort of threat hanging over our heads.
Thorin, bless him, is trying to keep it from me and I shall let him alone in his delusions for a while longer as I am aware he’s trying not to worry me. It’s our honeymoon, for God’s sake - so I understand this but really, he ought to know that things like this are burdens best shared. Partner, best friend and husband with the vows and everything, yeah?
How’s Bag End doing? I’m sure Cousins Drogo and Prim are doing a fine job of looking after the store for me. Tell Fili and Kili to stay out of trouble, yeah? I’m sure it’s a futile thing to say but at least I can tell their Uncle Thorin I tried. Haha.
Five-0’s Commander McGarrett is apparently a friend of yours back in Afghanistan? He’s asked me to tell you “Aloha!” and that there’s a steak dinner waiting for you and your bloke should you two ever get around to Hawaii. I must recommend it for YOUR honeymoon, if you could drag Sherlock out of Baker Street and onto a beach. It would be good for him, I expect.
So Aloha from Hawaii and see you when I get back home,
Note: Obviously, Bilbo hasn’t a clue that John and Sherlock are on their way to Hawaii. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
This is also for the lovely thelonelyotakugirl who apparently needs all the Brain Breaks *koffdistractionskoff* she can get.
I have been educating my sweet Mommy Duck on Cumberbitches and Cumberbabes. Being as Mom’s not about to go about calling herself a “Cumberbitch” (different strokes for a different generation, guys), I said, “I guess that makes you a brand new Cumberbabe, my Duck!”
Mommy Duck’s response:
Anak, I am not a Cumberbabe. I am a CumberMommyDuck!
Rock. On. CumberMommyDuck!
this is the man we’ve chosen to love
and let’s not forget about
remember this one, you can’t forget him
Or this one
And this one.
Not to mention this guy.
cant forget about our moose
Don’t forget this Majestic Doofus: